The Introvert

Back from Frontier. We stayed in Abbottabad, where the military run schools have been closed due to the fear of kidnappings by the Taliban. It was a nice 'trip.' Maybe i will write more about it later. 

For whatever it is worth, I have only realized now how much of an introvert i am. I think it is probably more than that. Curious at my unease in social occasions and amongst group of people, I did a quick google search about these kinds of symptoms. Interestingly, it turns out that i am inflicted with a mild form Social anxiety. I was rather relieved to learn that it is pretty normal to have such a disorder and that there are number of people who suffer from the same thing. I think this is the reason which sort of drives me underground, so to speak. Underground from the normalcy of life. I hate those regular meetings at the social club, where all the women gossip like they have nothing better to do. But than maybe i also resent them for their ability to adjust. I can fake comfort in their world, but i feel like an outcast from the esteem. I live in my own little world and it suits me better.

I am seeing him again. We just met for a cup of tea and it was nice chatting with him. He said that he 'wants me,' which is a signal for a more intimate meeting. I want it to but for now i am hesitant and will resist his urges the temptations and the desire take over.